ON THIS PAGE
Safe Sex
Mental Health
Dysphoria (+binding)
SAFE SEX
When sex education was introduced to the general public, it was focused on information pertaining to straight cisgender people. During that time, there was a lot of discrimination associated with being LGBT. Gender-inclusive terms such as nonbinary and trans hadn’t even entered mainstream language yet. Discrimination in the sex ed world and a lack of access to healthcare created high risks for the LGBT community. Giving more inclusive information gives people the comfort and confidence to explore their sexual desires with less anxiety and risk. Understanding different types of sex and ways to make it safer is the first step in taking charge of one’s sexual health.
STDS
An STD is an infection that’s passed from one person to another through sexual activity. Although there’s a lot of negative stigmas and shame associated with contracting STDs, it’s actually quite common. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, there are about 20 million new STDs contracted every year in the United States, and about half of the cases occur among people aged 15-24. Although talking about STDs can be scary, it’s important to be tested regularly and talk with one’s healthcare provider about them if they’re sexually active. It’s also very important because many who are positive don’t realize they are. Many have little to no visible symptoms. Most can be treated easily with medication. Treatment is typically a course of antibiotics. However, when STDs go untreated, serious health issues can arise.
Transmission can occur through:
Skin-to-skin contact
vaginal/front hole sex
anal sex
oral sex
contact with bodily fluids, such as blood or semen
needles
TESTING POSITIVE
When someone tests positive, it becomes their responsibility to share this status with past partners who may have been exposed and current partners who could be exposed. That said, the person sharing the news shouldn’t be made to feel bad about their status. For many who have had an STD in the past, they took medication, no longer have it, and therefore can’t transmit it.
For others, they might have an STD with chronic symptoms they need to manage in an ongoing way. Open, honest, nonjudgmental communication will lead to better sex. Plus, there are tons of ways to stay safe even if someone has an existing STD.
PROTECTION
Using barriers during sex helps reduce the risk of getting or giving STDs to partners, providing peace of mind that can make sex more pleasurable. Barriers should also be used with sex toys. However, in order to get the most out of sexual protection barriers, they need to be used correctly.
For those with a latex allergy, use a non-latex condom made with polypropylene or polyurethane.
Inside condoms can be used with a front hole or an anus. They’re designed to line the wall of the front hole or anus to prevent bodily fluids from coming into contact with the toy or penetrating body part. They’re harder to find than outside condoms, but health clinics often have them. They’re also available by prescription.
Outside condoms are barriers that can be used for sex involving a penis. They’re designed to contain bodily fluids, such as semen, that are released. They can be purchased at convenience stores, grocery stores, and drugstores. They can be purchased at any age and are usually free at health centers or STD testing clinics.
Dental dams can be used with lots of different body parts. It’s also a barrier. They can be harder to find in stores, but you can create your own by cutting open an outside condom.
Sterile gloves are a great way to stay safe when using hands or fingers.
Lube by itself isn’t very effective, but it can still help. It prevents excessive friction from occurring, which can break down condoms or cause small tears in the genital area. If using a latex barrier as well, you need to make sure to use a lube that’s safe for latex. Non-water based lubes break down latex, causing the barrier to become less effective. Water-based is a good choice. They can be used on latex, toys, and body parts. There is also edible lube for oral sex.
MENTAL HEALTH
There are many cases of homosexuality linking to mental health. While being LGBT is not a mental illness, studies do show that those people experience greater levels of anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and suicidal feelings.
This is likely caused by discrimination, negative stigma, and rejection from friends and family, or even confusion. Sexuality is often referred to between a man and a woman. When queer teenagers don’t feel attracted to the opposite sex, they can struggle to understand why they’re different. The Recovery Village surveyed 400 people, 354 of which identified as LGBT. Close to 75% of these respondents said that they experienced some sort of abuse or bullying. High percentages showed that respondents also experienced child abuse. At a glance, these appear as temporary struggles that fade over time, but for many, it's psychologically scarring.
One of the most common problems is PTSD. PTSD can result from a single traumatic experience or a collection of events. Many LGBT teenagers feign heterosexuality in an attempt to fit in and avoid being abused. When they accept themself and open up, it only creates an even bigger risk for bullying and abuse. The combination of being abuse and not receiving proper support can cause a child to feel isolated, humiliated and lacking in self-esteem. They may carry their identity as a secret for years because the fear of judgement seems scarier than being closed off from loved ones.
DYSPHORIA
WHAT DOES GENDER DYSPHORIA FEEL LIKE?
Gender dysphoria is oftentimes defined as discomfort with one’s existing physical features. It feels like a “deep ache in the pit of [one’s] belly.” It feels like “the worst-fitting outfit you’ve ever put together, but you can never take it off. Or sometimes it’s more like a pebble in your shoe, or a belt that digs into your side, or a tiny thing that is just noticeable to throw your whole day off.” Sometimes it’s there, sometimes it’s not. Some days it’s because somebody “tried to fit their not-so-masculine/feminine body into fitting clothes, and the parts that didn’t fit made them want to scream and disappear and puke up all their guts at the same time.” It feels like they’ve been detached from something essential and are about to wash out to sea. Identifying gender dysphoria can sometimes be diffifcult, especially for those who identity as nonbinary.
SHOULD I MEDICALLY TRANSITION?
While many cope with dysphoria by medically transitioning, which can cause many positive effects, it isn’t always appropriate or available for others. Whether because of prohibitive expense, social stigma, illegality, or just plain not wanting to, medically transitioning is not a viable coping mechanism for everyone. Whether medically transitioning is the right choice for someone or not, they need ways of addressing dysphoria.
OTHER WAYS TO COMBAT DYSPHORIA
Self-care (surround with loved ones, vocalize needs, spend time with pets, blast music)
Hobbies, art, crafting, building
Connect with nature
Point out positive things about your body
Find a trans role model
Look to the past to see how far you've come
Write
Breathe
Take a walk/exercise
Read
NONPERMANENT TRANSITIONING
Some people have much more freedom to express themselves than others. Even for those who cannot display their true selves in public, it can be very affirming to find some way to channel dysphoria into external expression. It could be something very small, but that has personal significance for you. You could try makeup, contouring, binding, packing or self-expression through fashion, even through simply changing one’s hair or clothing. For some, making alterations to their flesh, such as tattoos or piercings, can help them feel more like their true self because it allows them to feel in control of their body. Asserting your pronouns can also be very empowering. Actions such as these can alleviate dysphoria and nurture self-love.
SAFE BINDING
Chest binding (compressing breast tissue to give the appearance of a flat chest) is a common practice among masculine transgender people. At the same time, not every trans guy chooses to bind his chest. For some, breasts are a source of dysphoria, them being a visual reminder of their assigned sex. However, while binding can improve mental health, it can also put physical health in jeopardy. It can affect skin, muscles, breathing, and movement; especially over long periods of time. It’s extremely important to be careful while binding. People bind in many different ways: elastic bandages, duct tape, plastic wrap, sports bra, layering shirts, commercially-available binders. Some bind only for special occasions, others every day. Unfortunately, tightly covering the skin and chest with materials that don’t allow free-flowing air can create environments for bacterial and fungal infections to develop. Because those who bind more frequently are more likely to experience negative symptoms, taking days off between binding may help decrease that risk.
QUICK BINDING TIPS
Avoid binding while working out. This is when you need to breathe deeply, move freely, and you are more likely to be sweating. If you want to flatten your chest while exercising, try to find a sports bra that has this effect.
Get the right fit. Try not to buy one that is too tight—if it causes pain, cuts/trauma, or restricts your breathing, then you need to go up a size or two.
Don’t bind with plastic wrap, duct-tape, or bandages. These are associated with increased negative symptoms. Duct tape can damage your skin, and bandages may tighten as you move. Sports bras, layering shirts, or wearing athletic or neoprene compression gear, are the options associated with the least amounts of negative side effects.
Always bind for less than 8 hours a day. Binding for long hours every day over time breaks down tissue and can cause breathing problems, back pain, and skin irritation.
Always take your binder off before you sleep.
